Goodbye

Midnight Orchid
Originally uploaded by shinichiro*

You died last week.

It was senseless and stupid that you did. It wasn't time.

I wasn't ready.

I guess I wouldn't have been no matter what, though.

Being there with you was something I'll always be glad I did. Feeling the love everyone had for you and each other, hearing the words that eased your passing, and seeing that it was as soft and peaceful as I can imagine death ever being was a great comfort, one I've been able to pass on to others who were not there.

I'll miss you. The words aren't strong enough, really. You were so alive, so vibrant. Even when you were sad, even when I could tell you were hurting, physically or inside, you were a brilliant light in my life. I always looked forward to time spent with you, and I will remember our times together. I remember you under the stars, by the fires, in the sound of the drums. I will remember you when I dance, when I create, and whenever I see a squirrel.

We, all of us, can, have, and will live without you. We just wish we didn't have to.

Goodbye Mischka.